You might be a redneck if

might be a redneck if... the best looking part of you bike is where you've spray painted the number plates and sharpied the wheels!
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needs jack Daniel's old no7 stickers and a rebel flat on the front number plate :smirk:
 
If you know what 1/2" MOA means and you get excited when you achieve it. At great distances.
You can cook a gourmet meal over an open fire.
You dispose of used appliances with generous amounts of Tannerite.
You feel weird sitting outside without a firearm to garner edible critters which WILL walk by while you are trying to nap.
If you have ever cooked and eaten game while it was still warm by it's own body heat.
If you have ever used fresh killed game in your shooting vest pockets to keep you warm like a hot water bottle while sitting in a freezing cold blind.
You own a black powder cannon specifically made to shoot golf balls reasonably accurately at 500+ yards.
You carry cables and chains in the truck to peel your REAL redneck neighbors at your cabin off telephone poles and out of ravines when they get blind, snot-slinging drunk on moonshine.
The local bar serves you a giant tumbler of real moonshine and lemonade for $2.50 if you know the password.
The local bar charges you DOUBLE for your drinks after you fight in the bar that night, and that policy is posted in writing behind the bar.
You toss all your pocket change on the breath mint/strainer in the urinal and come back later to find that just the silver is missing, and the biggest drunk in the bar is paying his $1.00 for a Old Mil Ice beer with change and you almost burst a vein in your head laughing.
An ugly girl in the local bar asks you three times to dance with her, you refuse, take out 2 pennies, a nickle, and a dime out of your pocket, jingle them in your hand in front of her, and say "If you have more teeth in your head than I have change in my hand, I'll pick the tune." And she wants to fight you afterward, but you leave because you don't want to pay double for your drinks the rest of the night!
If at the local bar, people go outside and fight, one guy stabs the other with a knife in the shoulder, and they come back inside and buy each other beers, while the stabee bleeds a pile of blood under his barstool.
If there is NO LAW to speak of and you can do just about anything you can think of anywhere you see and get away with it.

That would be my idea of a redneck place! I don't know if it exists anywhere though!:devil:
 
If you know what 1/2" MOA means and you get excited when you achieve it. At great distances.
You can cook a gourmet meal over an open fire.
You dispose of used appliances with generous amounts of Tannerite.
You feel weird sitting outside without a firearm to garner edible critters which WILL walk by while you are trying to nap.
If you have ever cooked and eaten game while it was still warm by it's own body heat.
If you have ever used fresh killed game in your shooting vest pockets to keep you warm like a hot water bottle while sitting in a freezing cold blind.
You own a black powder cannon specifically made to shoot golf balls reasonably accurately at 500+ yards.
You carry cables and chains in the truck to peel your REAL redneck neighbors at your cabin off telephone poles and out of ravines when they get blind, snot-slinging drunk on moonshine.
The local bar serves you a giant tumbler of real moonshine and lemonade for $2.50 if you know the password.
The local bar charges you DOUBLE for your drinks after you fight in the bar that night, and that policy is posted in writing behind the bar.
You toss all your pocket change on the breath mint/strainer in the urinal and come back later to find that just the silver is missing, and the biggest drunk in the bar is paying his $1.00 for a Old Mil Ice beer with change and you almost burst a vein in your head laughing.
An ugly girl in the local bar asks you three times to dance with her, you refuse, take out 2 pennies, a nickle, and a dime out of your pocket, jingle them in your hand in front of her, and say "If you have more teeth in your head than I have change in my hand, I'll pick the tune." And she wants to fight you afterward, but you leave because you don't want to pay double for your drinks the rest of the night!
If at the local bar, people go outside and fight, one guy stabs the other with a knife in the shoulder, and they come back inside and buy each other beers, while the stabee bleeds a pile of blood under his barstool.
If there is NO LAW to speak of and you can do just about anything you can think of anywhere you see and get away with it.

That would be my idea of a redneck place! I don't know if it exists anywhere though!:devil:

Geez, what a beautiful post. :P I have done way too many of those. Except the bar stuff. :prof:

Buck, I think we need to schedule a hunting day together. Especially after reading about how you cook. White tails, coons, quail, whatever we got! I'll bring extra ammo.
 
Geez, what a beautiful post. :P I have done way too many of those. Except the bar stuff. :prof:

Buck, I think we need to schedule a hunting day together. Especially after reading about how you cook. White tails, coons, quail, whatever we got! I'll bring extra ammo.

I was just thinking what would be redneck stuff! None of that ever happened! :devil:

You are a young dude...unfit and underage for these experiences. Talk to me in 6 years!:thumb:
 
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